2/30 2016 Untitled


I am saving myself now/ Got no favors/ No hand outs to give/ only smiles/ and hugs/ when I've got spare me to give/ I suppose the problem with thinking you can save folks is/ you can if they are in range/ just far enough/ If they are close they can't hear you/ the same is true if too distant 


Every night before I fall asleep/ I feel the creep of an arm/ hairy/ soft/ reaching across me/ his arm/ gentle/ his scent is a lullaby/ comforts me/ I sleep/ well/ to the feel of him. 


I wonder if my past loves were loves at all/ wonder if the wounds have made me forgetful/ wonder if it happened at all/ I cant even count my lovers anymore/ and not because the numbers are so high but because/ i can hardly remember their touch/ cant remember if i made up how in love I was/ how good it felt to be underneath the full of them/ If it was good or just a warm body on top of me


I find it hard to sleep lately/ find it hard to put into words this disgust/ this filth/ this nation and its people/ how we rarely make progress if not threatened 


When I was in Jr.High, I vowed to myself to be a better person/ To be non-violent/ to be someone great/ what I didn't know is how trash truck most folks are/ I do not sleep well because I cannot unknow what I know/ I cannot shake the hurt and disappointment/ cannot settle how unsafe I feel/ even with good white folks.